Why Don't We Give What We Receive?
I have often said that the most basic prayer anyone can pray is, "Lord, have mercy." We Anglicans often pray that liturgically; The Litany, for instance, is one extended plea for mercy. But the cry is not just for Anglicans; it is the intuitive and instinctive plea of every person in trouble, regardless of denominational affiliation.
The most important form of that prayer was prayed by the tax collector, who stood behind the Pharisee in temple courtyard: "Lord, be merciful to me a sinner" (Luke 18:13). That was the last audible prayer, of godly theologian John Murray as he died of cancer. Those words I was surprised but moved deeply to find on the tombstone of my faithful friend, and fellow sinner, Bob Manning. Anyone who knows himself or herself a sinner (and the question is not whether it is true but whether we know it) and deserving punishment knows the need to implore our Lord to be merciful to us by sparing us what we deserve.
We call out for mercy, not just when we are conscious of our sins and what they deserve, but any time we are in trouble - when our health takes a turn for the worse, when our jobs might be lost, when our children put us in the place of not knowing how to help them, when our marriages are in trouble, when the burden of elderly parents grows heavy, when friendships are betrayed, when money is short, and especially when we are facing the discipline we deserve for our sins. Anytime we are in trouble we join with Bartimaeus and the other blind men, with the lepers, with the Canaanite mother whose daughter was demon possessed, with the father of the boy who had seizures that caused him to fall into fire and water, and we cry out, "Lord, have mercy; Jesus have mercy."
The primary difference between grace and mercy is that grace focuses on blessings we don't deserve while mercy focuses on consequences we do deserve. Grace is God's giving us what we don't deserve and doing for us want we can't do for ourselves. Mercy is about God's relenting and sparing us the punishment and suffering we have earned. Grace is the empty hand held out to receive blessing; mercy is the hat in the hand pleading to be spared.
If any Christians ought to understand and appreciate mercy, it is those of us Christians who identify as evangelicals, Christians who believe the good news that God saves sinners from wrath and hell by the work of Jesus Christ, received by faith. But, there is something about us evangelicals, of whom none is worse than I, that has caused me to puzzle for a long time, and as I get older, perplexes me more and more. I struggle with something about us evangelicals - what we believe, what we experience, how we live.
It's this: We have received mercy; yet we have trouble extending mercy. We have been spared judgment; yet we are judgmental. We have been helped; yet we withhold help. Our pleas have been heard; yet we turn a deaf ear to others. We have received tender mercies; yet we give harsh justice. As I said, I am to my own chagrin to be found among all these pairs of contrasting treatment, both in what I have asked God to give me and what I have withheld from others.
Too often we find ourselves saying to others or hearing others say to us the words of Job: "Have mercy on me, have mercy on me, O you my friends, for the hand of God has touched me!" (Job 19:21).
Peter once asked Jesus about forgiving mercy, "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" No doubt Peter's jaw dropped when Jesus said, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times" (Matthew 18:21,22). Jesus didn't leave Peter with the bare statement. He followed up with a story.
There was a servant who owed a king a huge debt. When the king called on his servant to pay him, he could not, so the king ordered the man, his wife, and children to be sold in lieu of payment. The man immediately pleaded for patience and promised something he could not do, to repay the debt in time. The king knew there were only two options, sell the man and his family or forgive the debt. The king canceled the debt.
But something strange, but not so strange if we know ourselves and the church, followed. When the servant left the king's presence, he encountered another servant, who owed him a small debt. The forgiven servant grabbed his fellow servant by the throat and demanded immediate payment. The indebted servant pleaded for patience and promised payment. The just forgiven servant, to whom the small the debt was owed, would have none of it. He had the man thrown into prison till he paid the debt. Having received mercy, he withheld mercy.
The king became angry and ordered the forgiven but unforgiving servant thrown into jail until he paid every last cent of the debt. Jesus warned: "So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart" (Matthew 18:35).
So, why am I, having received mercy, so prone to be unmerciful? Why is the church not more a community where people find mercy? And why are we evangelical Christians who preach, talk, and sing so much of mercy, so often prone to administer judgment to fellow sinners?
"Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy" (Matthew 5:7).
