Jesus's Scandalous Relationship with a Sinner Woman

Jesus’s Scandalous Relationship with a Sinner Woman

A sermon preached at the First Presbyterian Church of Water Valley on Sunday, July 29, 2018.

Note: I have preached on this text in the past. However, I could not have written and preached it as presented here, except for two graces of the Lord. (1) Through people and providence the Lord showed me my sins in a new and powerful way. I see that I am what Brennan Manning calls "a ragamuffin Christian." That is what I always have been, am now, and I know always will be. (2) The Lord pointed me to an author about whose writings I have some misgivings and with which I have some disagreements, the aforementioned Brennan Manning. At a point of greatest despair it was almost as if the Lord pointed me to The Ragamuffin Gospel, lying on the floor under a chair, and said, "Pick it up and read." That book saved my life, my sanity, and my spirit. I saw that I was a "mess-up," but Jesus loves people who have messed up, forgives them, and accepts them - immediately upon their return to him.

Gospel Reading: St Luke 7:36-50

36 One of the Pharisees asked him to eat with him, and he went into the Pharisee's house and reclined at table. 37 And behold, a woman of the city, who was a sinner, when she learned that he was reclining at table in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster flask of ointment, 38 and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears and wiped them with the hair of her head and kissed his feet and anointed them with the ointment. 39 Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner.” 40 And Jesus answering said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” And he answered, “Say it, Teacher.”

41 “A certain moneylender had two debtors. One owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. 42 When they could not pay, he cancelled the debt of both. Now which of them will love him more?” 43 Simon answered, “The one, I suppose, for whom he cancelled the larger debt.” And he said to him, “You have judged rightly.” 44 Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. 46 You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. 47 Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.” 48 And he said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.” 49 Then those who were at table with him began to say among themselves, “Who is this, who even forgives sins?” 50 And he said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”


Who do you think is the worst man or woman in Water Valley? The person you don’t respect at all. If you saw the person in the grocery store and could not avoid that person, and you managed a Southern smile and “How are you?”, inwardly you'd still despise that person. Whom you wouldn’t want your children or grandchildren around. Whom you’d never invite into your home.

Now imagine next Sunday that person came into church and sat on the front row, not knowing Presbyterians never do that. Throughout the service you hear soft sobs from that person. At the end of the service that person runs to the Pastor, embraces him and cries like a baby. The person makes a scene. And what if the Pastor didn’t pull away?

How would you think about yourself? About that sinful person? About the Pastor?

1. The Scene

A Pharisee named Simon asked Jesus to have dinner at his home, and Jesus accepted. Jesus would eat with anyone, He went to a feast at the home of the despised tax collector, Matthew who invited his friends, other tax collectors. This upset people like Simon, who asked, “Why do you eat with tax collectors - men for the money serve the hated Roman government? Why eat with sinners - people who live openly flagrant lives that violate the Law?” This continually offended people like Simon.

But Jesus also accepted invitations from people like Simon. Simon was a Pharisee. He belonged to the most conservative theological and moral Jewish religious group. Pharisees were devoted to the Old Testament law and Jewish traditions. They strictly obeyed the laws and traditions, and encouraged others to do so. They considered themselves set apart from ordinary Jews. Many people looked up to them as examples of holy and righteous people. Simon was interested in Jesus, and may have invited him so he could ask Jesus questions and test his loyalty to the laws and traditions.

There are a few things we need to know about meals like this: The food was placed on a table. The guests lay on couches with their heads toward the table and their feet pointed away. They supported themselves on their left arms and used their right hands to take food from the table.

Just as we have customs for the way we welcome people into our homes, so the Jews had customs. The host would provide water and a towel, so guests could wash the dust off their sandaled feet. He would greet the guests with a kiss on the cheek, similar to our handshake or hug. He would anoint the guests with an olive oil mixture.

Also, homes were open, during social occasions like this meal. People from town could come in, see who was there, what was served, listen to the conversation, and then leave as they wished.

But just as we would not welcome just anyone into our homes, so Simon would not. However, this day a woman known as a public sinner - very likely a prostitute, a woman whom Jesus said had many sins - came into the house. She had in her hand an alabaster jar that contained expensive perfumed ointment. She went to the couch where Jesus reclined. When she reached him, she broke down in tears. She cried so profusely she wet the feet of Jesus as though water had been poured over them. She had no towel, so she used her hair to dry his feet. Then she began to kiss his feet. Finally, she broke the top off the alabaster jar and poured the expensive ointment over Jesus feet. Jesus did nothing to stop her.

2. The Scandal

When Simon saw this, he immediately discredited Jesus as a prophet. You know how we can see something that shocks us and say nothing? That’s how Simon responded. What happened was a scandal; however, he said nothing. But Simon thought, “There is no way this Jesus is a prophet. If he were, he would discern what kind of woman this is, even if he did not know her and her reputation." This woman is a ostracized, public sinner.

Yet Jesus let her touch him and in a publicly scandalous way. Jesus was always touching people and letting people touch him you weren’t supposed to have physical contact with because contact defilted you according to the Ceremonial Law - lepers, a woman with a medical problem that caused a constant discharge of blood, and even dead bodies. This was perhaps the worst of all - an immoral woman wiping her tears from his feet with her hair, kissing his feet over and again, anointing his feet with perfumed ointment.

Jesus immediately showed he was a prophet. Though Simon said nothing, Jesus knew exactly what Simon was thinking. He told Simon he had something to say to him, and Simon invited Jesus to say it.

So Jesus told a story. There were two men both in debt with a money lender. One owed 500 denarii. The other owed 50. Neither had the resources to pay the debt. A denarius was a day laborer’s pay. By day laborer standards, if neither did anything but work off his debt, one would have to work 50 days to get out of debt and the other a year and almost 7 months. Of course, it would take each much longer because each had to have something to live on while he paid down the debt. Practically there was no way either could pay his debt. But the moneylender did a totally unexpected thing. He cancelled the debts of both. He just took them off his books. They had no more debt, no more obligation. He freely forgave their debts that they could not pay.

Jesus said, “Simon, I want you think about that story. Which one would love the moneylender more - one who owed 50 denarii or the one who owed 500?” Simon grudgingly answered: “ I suppose it would be the one who owed 500.”

Why of course! Even Simon could figure that one out. Simon had not shown Jesus even common courtesies. Why? Because he did not love Jesus. He didn’t love Jesus because he felt no need for Jesus to forgive him anything.

In contrast there was this woman. She was a sinner. There was no denying it. Everybody knew it. Most important she knew it. In fact, Jesus says her sins were many. Yet she had showered him with love.

It was a public and extravagant display of love. But there was nothing self-conscious about it. She wasn’t seeking notice or attention. She knew where Jesus was. She wanted to anoint him with the ointment. But, when she got there she was overcome with the emotion of love. So she broke down, wet his feet with tears, dried them with her hair, kissed his feet, and then poured the ointment over them. She loved much because Jesus forgave her much.

We should ask, Why was she forgiven? Did she somehow earn Jesus forgiveness by acts of love? Did her changed life evidenced by these loving acts merit forgiveness? Did her love get her Jesus’s forgiveness? No, Jesus makes it clear. She was forgiven the same way the two debtors were forgiven. Her guilt was simply stricken from the record by the free forgiveness of Jesus.

How did she receive this forgiveness? Jesus says, “Your faith has saved you.” She believed that Jesus could forgive her. She did not try to deny, or explain away, or minimize her sins. She knew they were grievous and many, but that Jesus could and would forgive her. So she trusted him that he could forgive her and do whatever was necessary to forgive her - which turned out to be dying for her sins. She rested her confidence in him to free her from the guilt of her sins and save her from the condemnation and judgment her sins deserved. It was that free forgiveness, received by faith, that produced in her such great feelings and acts of love.

3. The Seeing

What we need to do is really to see the three people - Simon the Pharisee, the Sinner Woman, and the Jesus the Savior.

We should ask ourselves an uncomfortable question: how much we have in common with Simon? We are conservative Christians. Our theology is conservative. Our morality is conservative. We are concerned about the moral drift in our society. Approval of homosexual practice and marriage. Acceptance of a woman’s right to end her pregnancy for any reason. More young people living together but not married and apparently not concerned. Children born to unwed mothers and growing up without fathers. But is there any Simon in us? Do we feel we are morally superior? Are we confident of our own righteousness? Would we be offended if Jesus loved, forgave, and accepted immoral people? Would we rather he had nothing to do with them - that he judged and condemned them? Or, if he is going to forgive then, do we want Jesus to watch them awhile and see if they are sincere before he forgives them? It’s so easy for us to become self-righteous Simons. Are our sympathies more with Simon and the Savior?

But some of us - even this morning - can find great hope and comfort from this woman and the way Jesus treated her. Some of us have really messed up our lives. Even Christians can really mess up their lives. We can be haunted by memories of what we have done, whether a long time ago or very recently. We are ashamed and embarrassed. We may be tempted to despair that Jesus could still love us, forgive us, accept us. But this woman stands as a testimony that there is hope for us no matter how great and how many our sins, no matter how bad we have messed up. He freely forgives. He is ready forgive us right now. All he asks is - not that we clean up our lives before we come to him, not that we prove ourselves worthy of his forgiveness - but simply that we trust him as the One who can and will forgive and accept us right now, today. There is no sin too bad, there are no sins too numerous. Jesus can and will forgive all sins, and Jesus will receive us and accept us as soon as we turn to him for forgiveness. And, when he forgives us, we won’t be able to help but love him.

And, all of us, whether we are self-righteous Simons or terribly sinful sinners, need to look at Jesus. He is the Son of God. He has authority to forgive sins. Whatever Jesus does, God does. Whatever Jesus says, God says. Jesus forgives the sins of all who come to him. He has the authority to say to us, “Go in peace.” Go from this church at peace with God. Tomorrow, when we sin, we can go to him again. He will forgive us. He will say to us again, “Your faith in me has saved you. Go in peace.” We don’t have to be in doubt. He doesn’t offer a conditional forgiveness based on our successfully passing a probationary time. We don’t have to wait. If we go to him, confessing our sins, and asking his forgiveness, he will say to us in that moment, “Your sins are forgiven, Go in peace.” Go in peace today. Go in peace tomorrow. Go in peace every time you sin, no matter how badly. Ask his forgiveness. He will never fail to say, “Go in peace.”

New Every Morning

A New Start Everyday

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;

his mercies never come to an end;

they are new every morning;

great is your faithfulness.

“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,

“therefore I will hope in him.”

Lamentations 3:22-24

When our Lord and Master Jesus Christ said “Repent,” he intended that the entire life of believers should be repentance. Martin Luther, first of the 95 Theses. 

We are beggars! This is true. Luther's last written words. 

God be merciful to me, a sinner. John's Murray's last audible prayer. 

It might be said that Morning Prayer from The Book of Common Prayer is obsessed with both sin and righteousness. The Opening Sentences remind us we are sinners who need forgiveness, the presiding Minister calling himself and all God's people to confession with verses from Scripture. For instance:

I acknowledge my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Psalm li. 3 Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities. Psalm li. 9. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. Psalm li. 17. Rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil. Joel ii. 13. To the Lord our God belong mercies and forgivenesses, though we have rebelled against him; neither have we obeyed the voice of the Lord our God, to walk in his laws which he set before us. Daniel ix. 9, 10. O Lord, correct me, but with judgment; not in thine anger, lest thou bring me to nothing. Jer. x. 24. Psalm vi. 1. Enter not into judgment with thy servant, O Lord; for in thy sight shall no man living be justified. Psalm cxliii. 2.

There follows the Prayer of Confession. Every day we confess the reality about ourselves to the Lord and ask his forgiveness:

Almighty and most merciful Father; We have erred, and strayed from thy ways like lost sheep. We have followed too much the devices and desires of our own hearts. We have offended against thy holy laws. We have left undone those things which we ought to have done; And we have done those things which we ought not to have done; And there is no health in us. But thou, O Lord, have mercy upon us, miserable offenders. Spare thou them, O God, who confess their faults. Restore thou them that are penitent; According to thy promises declared unto mankind in Christ Jesus our Lord.

But, as we ask forgiveness for Christ's sake, even with that request we have an eye on the life God calls us to live. We do not want to continue to sin, but for God to work change in our lives:

And grant, O most merciful Father, for his sake; That we may hereafter live a godly, righteous, and sober life, To the glory of thy holy Name. Amen.

 The minister assures us of God's forgiveness:

God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who desireth not the death of a sinner, but rather that he may turn from his wickedness, and live; and hath given power, and commandment, to his Ministers, to declare and pronounce to his people, being penitent, the Absolution and Remission of their sins : He pardoneth and absolveth all them that truly repent, and unfeignedly believe his holy Gospel 

In the Absolution, we are called to think about the reality of our confession for God "pardoned and absolveth all them that truly repent and unfeignedly believe his holy Gospel." The minister does not stop there, but calls upon us to pray for sincere repentance and resolve to live in a different way:

Wherefore let us beseech him to grant us true repentance, and his Holy Spirit, that those things may please him, which we do at this present; and that the rest of our life hereafter may be pure, and holy; so that at the last we may come to his eternal joy; through Jesus Christ our Lord.

There follows the Lord's Prayer, which we will repeat again later in the service, which includes our request that our trespasses may be forgiven:

Our Father, which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy Name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, As it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, As we forgive them that trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, But deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, The power, and the glory, For ever and ever. Amen.

In the Lord's Prayer there is the challenge whether forgiving grace has made us forgiving people, for we pray that God may forgive us as we forgive them that trespass against us. What is our attitude to toward those whom we think may have wronged us? Do we let grudges grow? Do we harbor resentments? Do we nurture bitterness? Or do we forgive them, even as we ask God to forgive us?

The call to us to worship God ends with a warning:

O come let us sing unto the Lord: let us heartily rejoice in the strength of our salvation. Let us come before his presence with thanksgiving: and shew ourselves glad in him with Psalms. For the Lord is a great God: and a great King above all gods. In his hand are all the corners of the earth: and the strength of the hills is his also. The sea is his, and he made it: and his hands prepared the dry land. O come, let us worship and fall down: and kneel before the Lord our Maker. For he is the Lord our God: and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. To day if ye will hear his voice, harden not your hearts: as in the provocation, and as in the day of temptation in the wilderness; When your fathers tempted me: proved me, and saw my works. Forty years long was I grieved with this generation, and said: It is a people that do err in their hearts, for they have not known my ways. Unto whom I sware in my wrath: that they should not enter into my rest. (Psalm 95)

I seldom can say that without the prayer that I will not harden my heart as Israel did in the wilderness, that the Lord would not find it necessary to say of me that he is grieved by my whole life, that I might not err in my heart or be among those who have not known the ways of the Lord. Most I pray that God may not in wrath exclude me from the eternal rest he promises his people.

As we say the beautiful ancient Te Deum Laudamus, we join with the angels, prophets, apostles and martyrs and with the church all over the world to praise God, the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, but we cannot close unless we pray about out our proneness to sin and plead for mercy:

Vouchsafe, O Lord: to keep us this day without sin. O Lord, have mercy upon us: have mercy upon us. O Lord, let thy mercy lighten upon us: as our trust is in thee. O Lord, in thee have I trusted : let me never be confounded.

In the Benedictus  of Zechariah (Luke 1:68-79), we give thanks that God in his mercy has remembered his covenant to deliver us from our enemies (at which time I think of Satan, sin, guilt, and condemnation), we do not forget the reason for our deliverance:

That we being delivered out of the hand of our enemies: might serve him without fear; In holiness and righteousness before him: all the days of our life.

When we say the Apostles' Creed there is a confession of belief at which I marvel and which I sometimes must strive to appropriate, this bold statement:

I believe...in the forgiveness of sins.

With the Collect for Grace we still have in mind our proneness to sin:

O Lord, our heavenly Father, Almighty and everlasting God, who hast safely brought us to the beginning of this day; Defend us in the same with thy mighty power; and grant that this day we fall into no sin, neither run into any kind of danger; but that all our doings may be ordered by thy governance, to do always that is righteous in thy sight; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

 As the service nears its end with the General Thanksgiving we are still mindful of who we are and of how we should respond to all the blessings God bestows on us:

Almighty God, Father of all mercies, we thine unworthy servants do give thee most humble and hearty thanks for all thy goodness and loving-kindness to us and to all men. We bless thee for our creation, preservation, and all the blessings of this life; but above all for thine inestimable love in the redemption of the world by our Lord Jesus Ch for the means of grace, and for the hope of glory. And, we beseech thee, give us that due sense of all thy mercies, that our hearts may be unfeignedly thankful; and that we show forth thy praise, not only with our lips, but in our lives, by giving up our selves to thy service, and by walking before thee in holiness and righteousness all our days; through Jesus Christ our Lord, to whom, with thee and the Holy Spirit, be all honor and glory, world without end. Amen.

I have to ask: "What am I to make of all this?" Every single day, I come before God reminded that I am a sinner, confessing my sins, receiving forgiveness, being charged to lead a new and better life - but I do it every day. Here is the way I make sense of it. What ties it all together is that God is a merciful and gracious God. Grace is the thread that runs throughout the service and its daily repetition. If God were not gracious he would not let us keep coming back every day with the same words upon our lips.

We never approach God with the knowledge that, even as Christians, no matter how much we may grow in grace, we are sinners. Sometimes there are fresh sins weighing heavily on our hearts. Sometimes there come to mind especially grievous sins we have committed whether recently or in the past, and when these come to mind, we are embarrassed and ashamed, and almost find it hard to believe that it is we who have done those things. But on every day, even when the remembrance of sins is not so fresh and vivid, we know who we are - sinners in need of mercy and forgiveness. And that is how we not only must but may come to God in daily worship. 

And every day, despite the fact that we asked for forgiveness just yesterday, and perhaps by ejaculatory prayers many times since, we may still ask for forgiveness again today and be assured that he "pardoneth and absolveth" our sins. Failures and misdeeds since yesterday do not disqualify us from asking pardoning mercy today.

Everyday we are reminded in several ways that God calls upon us to be different - to lead new and better lives, to be holy in character and righteous in conduct - and we pray for grace that it may be so. But, even if yesterday has been better than the day before, and especially if it has not, we still may come before God with the earnest desire that this day and all the days to come may be more pleasing to him.

It seems to me that woven throughout Morning Prayer are woven the triple themes of the Continental catechism, the Heidelberg - of Misery, Deliverance, Gratitude. That's the whole Christian life, not just at the outset, but every day till we arrive in glory.

What the daily repetition of Morning Prayer means is that every day we get a new start with God. We keep coming as sinners; he keeps forgiving us; we keep aspiring to lead lives more pleasing to him. There is no day we cannot start here. And starting here everyday gives us encouragement. We are Christians seeking to worship God and to receive from him those things which are "requisite and necessary, as well for the body as for the soul."

Yes, Morning Prayer is obsessed with sin and righteousness. But even more, by its existence for daily use, it is obsessed with grace.

And never does God allow us to leave the service without his blessing us: "The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Ghost, be with us all evermore. Amen." We always go from the service with the blessing of the Triune God imprinted on our hearts once again. Yes, grace, love, fellowship are for each and every believer each and every day.















 

It's Bad; It's Good

It's Bad; It's Good

For the Penitent Curmudgeon writing is both psychological and spiritual therapy. Writing helps me to sort out, organize, and make some sense of what transpires within. If this Blog does others any good, I am thankful. If it bears testimony to God's grace to others who may walk where I walk, I am glad for it. But, if nothing else, it does my own soul good to write. If anyone, who receives this Blog, does not wish to receive it, just shoot me an email, and I will, with curmudgeonly good cheer, remove your name from the distribution.

Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word. (Psalm 119:67, ESV)

The Lord has disciplined me severely, but he has not given me over to death. (Psalm 118:18, ESV)

The past two months have been the hardest of my life. I have experienced some hard times in the past - vocational failures, disappointments in friendships, the loss of my father, mother, and daughter-in-law, my children's trials and pains, times of relentless depression. But for me the present has been the most painful.

This will be no tell-all confessional. It is not necessary and would not be wise for you or me or considerate of others. It is enough to say that sin, abetted by depression, manifested itself in attitudes, words, and behaviors that were destructive to others and to me and dishonoring to God. Then the heavy hand of the Lord came down on me. At first I responded with more of the same attitudes, words, and actions. That gave way to utter, hopeless despair. Finally, it began to produce repentance.

Yesterday, I reached a new turning point, when I found myself saying to me, "This has been good for me; I am glad it happened." I am thankful for what the Lord has been doing in my life, and I pray for its continuance. These good things would not have happened without the bad things.

I do not mean to say that what was so hard has become easy and an unmixed blessing. It is not. Everyday, and especially during a certain portion  of the day, I feel depressed, alone, anxious, fearful about the future. In these times my experience is best described by the Psalmist:

Will the Lord absent himself for ever? and will he be no more intreated?
Is his mercy clean gone for ever? and is his promise come utterly to an end for evermore?
Hath God forgotten to be gracious? and will he shut up his loving- kindness in displeasure?          (Psalm 77:7-9, Coverdale)

At these times, I resort to what is my default "explanatory style" (thanks to my friend Charley Chase and his book Grace-Focused Optimist for this insight.) My default explanatory style is pessimistic about God's intentions. I believe God is not out to bless me, but to punish me. He will not restore anything he has taken, but take it all permanently to punish me for my sins and to teach me more lessons I must learn. At such times I see God with a "frowny face" as I try to look up at him. 

But I am thankful that, along with depressed and anxious times, there are times of contentment, peace, and hopefulness. How did God in the midst of my sin and his chastisement begin to do good things in my life?

The first is through my church and my Bishop Dan Morse. At his direction I had ceased my old Blog, and I had surrendered to him my ministerial license. He invited me to visit with him in Nashville. He led me through a service or reconciliation, and during the Absolution, I sensed reality of Lord's complete forgiveness of all my sins and, during Holy Communion, I experienced fellowship with the living Christ who has promised to be present in the giving and receiving of the consecrated bread and wine. It was one of the most profound religious experiences I have ever had. The next day came something I did not expect. Bishop Dan restored my ministerial credentials which allow me to minister Word and Sacrament. What I came to see was important was, not how others saw Bishop's handling of me, but what transpired among the Lord, my Bishop, and me.

At the same time the Lord was showing my sin more fully and vividly than ever before. When I saw that the problem was not detachable from me, but was me, I despaired of any hope. Then came the book which saved my life, sanity, and spirit, The Ragamuffin Gospel. I learned that Christians can and do sin and screw-up - sometimes spectacularly. That was me. I did not once feel that the author, Brennan Manning, gave me permission to sin, but I did feel that I did not have to despair because I was a sinner. God knows all that, and always has, and yet he loves me. A friend sent this quote from J.I. Packer that catches the message perfectly: "There is tremendous relief in knowing that His love to me is utterly realistic, based on prior knowledge of the worst about me, so that no discovery can now disillusion Him about me, in the way I am so often disillusioned about myself, and quench His determination to bless me."  Manning showed me I did not have to clean myself up or do penance (yes, evangelicals do penance before going to the Lord) to make up for what I had done. Nor did I have to know I was forever changed to go back to God when I failed. I could come "just as I am" assured that he would forgive me and be reconciled to me. It could be (understandably) hard for others, but God could and and would receive me. 

Another thing that happened was that, after much hit and miss with my Prayer Book, God enabled me to develop consistency. I was driven by the need for contact with the God of the Bible. My present practice is that I use Morning Prayer toward the beginning of the day. Then when I get in bed at night I use Evening Prayer for families along with some supplemental prayers. I do my best to focus my attention and open my heart so that none of this becomes rote. The Book of Common Prayer is saturated with the Bible. There are Psalms for every day. There are readings from the Old and New Testaments. The prayers cover Biblical subjects with Biblical words and teaching. And I can personalize it all to myself and circumstances. I am finding as I go through these exercises that God often speaks peace to my disquieted soul. The services of the Prayer Book are places where I can meet and interact with the living and true God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.

Then, we live in the small town of Water Valley. Most Sundays we attend worship with the Presbyterians, and most Wednesday nights attend their supper/Bible study/prayer meeting. I had stopped going to church altogether, but the pastor kept reaching out to me without pushing. Eventually the Lord enabled me to confide in the pastor and one of the elders. They responded to me as brothers and friends and have stuck by me. I would understand, if, despite my Bishop's restoration, they had wanted to watch me awhile, but with much grace they have invited me to preach in two weeks' time.

Then there is the place of confession and apology to those I have wronged. I go to them with words, because words are all I have with which to go, plus any "sense of me" they get from my words written or spoken, and any fleeting glimpses they get of my life.  They cannot see my heart. The right thing for me to do is to apologize. But, I have had to learn a difficult lesson. I do not control their responses, the substance or timing of them. That is up to the Lord and to them. Not only do I not control them; I should not. They need to respond as the Lord moves them with the freedom of their own consciences before him. 

My life has not become, "I'm traveling on the upward way; new heights I'm gaining everyday." No, I am on a roller coaster. During every point of every day, I am somewhere on that ride, and so with every week and group of weeks. But I believe the Lord has hold of me at every climb, descent, and turn.

Joseph was able to say to his brothers who betrayed him and years later came to fear what he would do to retaliate, "You meant it for evil, but God meant it for good." I have come to be able to say of the spiritual death spiral I was in, "I meant it for evil, but God meant it for good." 

Lately, as I continue to experience the Lord's chastisement, I have found hope in one of the verses used in the Prayer Book's call to confession:

Rend your heart, and not your garments, and turn unto the Lord your God: for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of the evil  (Joel 2:13).

No the Lord does not do evil in the moral sense. He has no need to repent of any sin, for he is holy, righteous, loving, and good in himself and all his ways. And, no the Lord does not "change his mind," as do we fallible humans because we make mistakes; he knows his own mind from eternity to eternity. But sometimes the Lord, having announced his intention to punish or having begun his chastisement, does from a human point of view, change his mind and not do to us what he threatened and what we deserve. He repents of it and spares us. It is my prayer that it may be so for me - that he may restore what the locusts have eaten.

If I come to mind, and the Lord puts me on your heart, pray for me that he, who has begun a good work in me, will continue to perfect it till the day of Jesus Christ.

What Kind of Curmudgeon Am I?

Already! But Not Yet!

From time to time people have asked why I use "curmudgeon" in the title of my Blog. Some, including dear friends, have criticized it, and thought I ought not to use it in order not to communicate that I am an angry, disgruntled Christian but one who reflects more the spirit of Christ.

When I began my first Blog, The Christian Curmudgeon, I explained:

Is “Christian curmudgeon” an oxymoron?

 A standard definition of a curmudgeon is “an ill-tempered (and frequently old) person full of stubborn ideas and opinions.” I plead guilty to the whole definition. I surely can be, though I hope I am not always, ill-tempered. Belonging to the earliest baby boomer group, I am not just frequently but all the time old. There is no doubt whatsoever that I have stubborn ideas and opinions. Some of those I hold for the fun of it, but most of them because I think them true. 

The curmudgeon partakes of the spirit of Linus Van Pelt: “I love mankind – it’s people I can’t stand.”  I said something similar in an early sermon and repeated it often: “The church would be a wonderful institution if it weren’t for the people.” The curmudgeon is often disappointed with people, not least himself. He understands well why the Bible tells us not to trust in man and why David, faced with three terrible options of chastisement, said, “Let me not fall into the hand of man.”

 The curmudgeon also partakes of the spirit of Network’s Howard Beale who persuaded viewers all over the United States to open their windows and shout “I’m as mad as hell, and I’m not going to take this anymore!” It’s not that he expects the protest to do much good. But it is his way of saying that things are just not right, himself perhaps the prime example. He agrees with both Cornelius Plantinga and Willie Nelson that things as they are is “not the way it’s supposed to be.”  But, while he is not optimistic, he has not lost all hope for some improvement, however halting and fleeting.

He has low expectations, at least in the short run. This curmudgeon once said, less than half jokingly, “I could never be a post-millennialist; I don’t have the temperament for it.” Actually, it’s not just temperament. It’s the conviction that the world is so messed up that nothing short of the personal coming of Jesus Christ in glory with power, to defeat the powers of darkness, to fix the broken world, and to set his people free from sin and death can put things right. A Christian curmudgeon is a long term optimist, but a short term pessimist. 

In the end a curmudgeon is something of an idealist, even romantic. He has a sense of utopia, but he is too realistic (and, I think, too Biblical in outlook) to be a utopian so long as this present age continues. In that sense, he longs for the final in-breaking of the kingdom of God, when at last the kingdoms of this world will be in reality the kingdom of our God and of his Christ and God’s will done on earth as it is in heaven. No more sin, no more thorns and thistles, no more sorrow, no more death, no more tears. 

No, I do not think a Christian can be a mere curmudgeon. But I hope a curmudgeon can be a mere Christian. What I set out to do in this blog is to speak, for what it’s worth, as a Christian curmudgeon.

 When my Google account got compromised several years ago, and I could not convince Google that I am I, I lost access to that Blog. So I began a new Blog titled just Just a Curmudgeon. I saw that everything I wrote was not explicitly Christian or Biblical. I wrote a lot about the area of common life we share will all people, and expressed opinions and views for which I did not wish to claim I was expressing the Christian view. I explained why I dropped the word "Christian" from the title:

Why drop "Christian" the title? Has The Curmudgeon apostatized? Not self-consciously. I remain a baptized, orthodox, reformational Christian. What then?  

Simply put, I like to write about a number of topics, and I do not think there is a Christian view, not even a Christian curmudgeonly view, of everything about which I write. I do not hold, as once I did, the "world-and-life-view" outlook that there is a distinctly Christian view of and/or approach to everything. I am always a Christian, sometimes better, other times worse, but I do not believe that there is a view of, or approach to, everything, that is grounded in the Christ, the Redeemer-King, and the Bible as redemptive revelation. I think God has spoken in his Son and his Word infallibly but not exhaustively. He has spoken to us a Word that is redemptively sufficient for us in this world (i.e. sufficient to show us the way of redemption and to enable us to believe and live as redeemed persons) but redemptive sufficiency does not require a Word about everything under the sun.

I am affirming the existence of the distinction between the sacred and the profane, the religious and the secular, the church and the world, or, as our Lord put it in a concrete case, what is God's and what is Caesar's. Put another way, I am saying I believe in the existence of two kingdoms, both under the sovereign rule of God, the kingdom of creation and the kingdom of redemption. We share life in the kingdom of creation with all mankind. We share life in the kingdom of redemption with all who are in the church... 

The bottom line is that I have opinions. They are my opinions, not God's. God gives me the freedom to have opinions, so long as I submit to what he says through his Son in his Word. I have an opinion about the Trinity, an opinion I believe is Biblical and obligatory on me and the whole church catholic. I have opinions about illegal immigrants, and I believe in my opinions enough sometimes to write about them, but I do not claim them as God's. Nor should I. 

Let me try one more word of explanation. The New Testament teaches what some call an "already-not yet" theology. Already Christ has accomplished full redemption and ascended to heaven where he sits at the Father's right hand as King. We are not waiting on Christ to become King. He already is. And the whole reality of redemption exists in Christ right now. That redemption is now expressed on earth in individuals who have responded with faith to his redeeming work. It exists in the church which is the earthly expression of his kingdom.

But the creation and all its structures and institutions, while benefiting from Christ's redemptive work, does not manifest anything like the fullness of Christ's redemption. Not even do Christians who live in constant conflict with the world, the flesh, and the devil within themselves. Christians are frail creatures, who are subject to temptation, sin, unbelief, and failure and who have to return to God continually to seek forgiveness and reconciliation and ask for grace to be more and more faithfully repentant. The church, too, is far from perfect. The church struggles with false doctrine, sin within its midst, and disunity everywhere from the local congregation to the church universal. There is much for us to grieve about regarding the state of the church. 

Paul put what I am trying to say this way:

For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now.  And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience (Romans 8:19-25, ESV).

Put simply: I am redeemed but not what I should be. The church is redeemed, but not what it should be. The creation is redeemed, but not what it should be. As a Christian, I am an imperfect man, who must live with myself. And I live where no perfection is found -  as a member of Christ's church, a citizen of the United States, a resident of this world, and a creature within creation.

So why the penitent curmudgeon? I have of late been and continue under the discipline of the Lord. Though many Christians have gone through more, the chastening feels to me severe. But God, I believe, has been at work in my life. He has shown me my sin as I have never seen it before. He has enabled me to own that sin and its consequences as mine. But he has also shown me his grace and mercy in Christ. I believe that even in my sin for Christ's sake God never stopped loving me, and that for Christ's sake he has forgiven me, reconciled me to himself, and restored me to his fellowship. I believe also God has enabled me to repent and change. I have a long way to go, and still wrestle with my sinful self and frail flesh, but, if, as I believe this is his work, then he will continue it and he will not stop until he brings it to perfection, freeing me from the menace of sin at death and freeing me from all its consequences at the resurrection.

Hence, I am a "penitent curmudgeon." I hope that this penitence will affect the curmudgeonly way I comment on the world. I do not wish to become a "Pollyanna" or portray myself as a victorious Christian except in the sense that I am victorious already in Christ. I will continue to be a realist, but a chastened realist. I will not close my eyes to the fact that I am not what I should be, the church is not what it should be, the earth is not what it should be, and the whole creation is not what it should be.

I will continue to look at life as one who lives in the "in-between" times - between the accomplishment of redemption and the full manifestation of redemption in the whole creation when Christ comes. That is what I mean when I say I am a curmudgeon but a penitent one.

A Ragamuffin and His Prayer Book

The Book of Common Prayer for a Ragamuffin

The primary positive attraction for me to Anglicanism was The Book of Common Prayer. It provides a form for worshiping God every Sunday that is reverent, saturated with the Bible, gives words (which still must be prayed from the heart) for full and balanced prayer, is deeply rooted in the history of the church and its worship, moves with rational development from open to close, and is a vehicle for a profound encounter with the Triune God. I love it.

The other appreciation for the Book is its provision for daily devotion through its resources, especially Morning Prayer. I do not have to wing it. I do not have to keep calling my attention back to what I am doing. I do not have to invent my own personal daily worship. It is all right there for me in Morning Prayer, if I will use it with a focused mind and open heart. At the same time it provides ample opportunities of personalizing as I read the Scriptures and and say the Prayers. My own use of Daily Prayer is through a phone app called ipray, which uses the traditional service and provides services for Morning Prayer, Noon Prayer, Evening Prayer, and Compline. I use Morning Prayer, unless for some reason I miss it, in which case I say Evening Prayer. 

Lately Morning Prayer has been a special opportunity for me to experience God's comfort and peace. If I miss it, I miss what my soul most greatly needs. Yet I find myself hesitating. When I wake up in the morning, I am groggy, so it takes a few cups of coffee and looking around at news sites till I am alert enough to devote myself to Morning Prayer. Yet, even then, I linger, finding one thing after another to postpone engaging God. "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." Yet once I give myself to Morning Prayer I do not regret is. 

There are almost endless places to personalize the service for one's own circumstances. In the Prayer of Confession, I often change, "Restore thou them that are penitent" to "Restore thou me as thou enablest me to be penitent." In the Absolution I almost always grab onto, after the pardon itself, "Wherefore let us beseech him to grant us true repentance, and his Holy Spirit..."

I love the way the Coverdale translation puts Psalm 56 which was read this morning: "Nevertheless, though sometime I am afraid, yet put I my trust in thee. I will comfort myself in God's word; yea, I will hope in God." Sometimes, yes often I am afraid, but the Psalmist was, also, at least sometimes, and he chose to put his trust in God at such times, something I need to learn more how to do. 

In addition to several Psalms there are always two additional readings, one from the Old Testament, one from the New, and opportunities to meditate on them and turn them into sentence prayers. There are two places where we sinners can ask God to deliver us from sin. In the Te Deum Laudamus, where we join in holy praise along with the angels, the prophets and apostles, and the church throughout the world,  we do not close except we pray, "Vouchsafe, O Lord, to keep us this day without sin." In the third collect,"for grace," we pray that God will "grant that this day we fall into no sin."

Daily we pray for peace, for the graces for protection and guidance through the day, for the President and civil government, for God's blessing upon all clergy and people (and here I can pray especially for my Bishop, Dan Morse, and my colleagues in ministry). We also pray for "all conditions of men" that they may know God's salvation, for the church, that all who call themselves Christians may live as Christians, and finally "we commend to thy fatherly goodness all those who are in anyway afflicted, or distressed, in mind, body, or estate; that it may please thee to comfort and deliver them, according to their several necessities; giving them patience under their sufferings, and a happy issue out of all their afflictions" (here there is opportunity to plug in petitions and intercessions for the needs of others). 

Before we conclude the Prayer Book gives us a wonderful prayer for something many of us struggle with - thanksgiving - where we may, if we wish, name our many and personal blessings. We do not end without the ancient Prayer of St. Chrysostom, where we both express confidence in God's grace and power to answer our prayers and also acknowledge God's freedom to answer them according to what he judges is most expedient for us. We pray above all that in this world we may have knowledge of God's truth and in the world to come everlasting life. We leave with the apostolic blessing upon our hearts, "The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Ghost."

I have learned to appreciate when I get in bed at night an abbreviated form of Evening Prayer found in the section of our Prayer Book called Family Prayer. There is the Lord's Prayer (already used twice during Morning Prayer), the collect of the day, a prayer for confession, contrition, and pardon with a prayer added that, if we fall into sin, we may reform and grow better in the future. There is an intercession in which we pray that the nations may have the light of the Gospel and for every member of Christ's church, as well as for those in authority.We pray for our relations, friends, and neighbors, and for our enemies. We ask God's mercy on all who are in any kind of trouble. Once again we have an excellent prayer for thanksgiving at the end of the day. Finally we pray for protection during the night. The part that I find most difficult to pray is what we may be given "grace always to live in such state that we may never be afraid to die; so that, living and dying, we may be thine, through the merits and satisfaction of thy dear Son Christ Jesus." As with Morning Prayer, so in the evening, we end with the Trinitarian blessing upon our hearts.

There are other prayers with which we may supplement family Evening Prayer. Among my favorites are two prayers "At Night," the prayers for "Quiet Confidence," "For Guidance," "For Trustfulness," "For the Absent," and "For Those We Love." There is something of peace and comfort for me in ending my day in this way.

This is what I do now. I offer it not as an example to be followed. There are a great many excellent examples from church history and the Anglican tradition. What I write is not that of a spiritual guide or a spiritual man. It is simply the testimony of a perpetual Christian ragamuffin of how God is currently blessing him through The Book of Common Prayer. If it provides any encouragement to other ragamuffins, then I will be gratified. If it helps no one, I am happy to offer it simply as a testimony of God's current mercy to this ragamuffin through this ancient Christian resource.  

The Ragamuffin Gospel: Final Reflections

Final Reflections on The Ragamuffin Gospel

I have finished reading Brennan Manning's The Ragamuffin Gospel that includes in an additional chapter some of his own reflections 15 years after the first publication of his book. Though I intend to, I have not worked my way through the appendix, 19 Mercies: A Spiritual Retreat. Now I am ready to read my dear friend Charley L. Chase's Grace-Focused Optimism. 

God placed Brennan Manning's The Ragamuffin Gospel in my hand at exactly the right time. My main wish is that I had been wiser in what I wrote as I reflected on it. The book has been criticized as making too light of sin, making forgiveness too easy, encouraging anti-nominianism, making too little of the chastening God may at times employ, of failing to acknowledge the consequences that sometimes accompany sin and remain, of being unbalanced in his handling of Biblical truth. The criticism I liked best was by a Roman Catholic who accused Manning of having "out-Luthered Luther." I recall that some of the Reformed, who emphasize the centrality of justification by faith, are accused of being "crypto-Lutherans," which I now think they should wear as a badge of honor. 

I think there are some justifiable criticisms of Manning, and I have some misgivings about some of the things he says. But the book's emphasis and strength is that it is about radical grace which is the only kind of grace there is, about the radical nature of justification by faith, and justification can't be anything unless it is radical. I think Manning is exactly right in emphasizing radical grace and radical justification. I remember once reading something that even Martyn Lloyd-Jones observed to the effect that if justification by faith is rightly preached, it will sound scandalous. Manning himself said that his book is nothing more than a working out of something the Presbyterian Francis Schaeffer wrote, "True spirituality consists in living moment by moment by the grace of Jesus Christ." 

The blessing of the book to me was that it came to me at a time when, having seen my sin in its stark reality - sin against God, others, and myself - I was at the point of utter despair. God was against me, and I was against me. How could I live seeing my sin and experiencing guilt and helpless to fix myself? The book brought me first the freedom to acknowledge the reality of my sin without being destroyed. Yes, I am a sinner; yes, I have sinned in grievous ways; yes I have hurt others; yes, I have left myself in a mess. I no longer needed to deceive myself or try to deceive others. I could give up the defenses, the explanations, the minimalizations, the mitigations. I was free to say, "It's true." I am what God's Word tells me I am, what others say I am, what my own accusing conscience tells me I am. I am free to own the truth.

But there was more. My sin did not mean the end of the road; it did not have the last word. God in Christ acted unilaterally to save sinners. He forgives us freely; he accepts us freely; he is reconciled to us freely. We don't earn his forgiveness. We don't figure out how to make up for our sins in order to get to the point that we can ask for his forgiveness. We don't have to clean ourselves up and then present ourselves to him and ask for forgiveness. We are accepted, forgiven, reconciled in Christ and because of what Christ has done for us. We do not have to go to bed tonight, and see, if perhaps, we can get forgiveness tomorrow. We can go to sleep at night knowing we are forgiven. God does not "like" us because of the good things we are or the good persons we are becoming. God loves us, knowing the worst about us. God loves us "anyway" - despite what we are and aren't, despite what we have done or not done. God's love is free. It just is. It is not conditional or in any way merited.

The book gave me the freedom to say, "I am a ragamuffin Christian at my best. That's the best I've ever been and the best I will ever be." To accept yourself as a ragamuffin Christian is not a license to sin and not care. But it does allow you to accept that you sin, that you often fail, that sometimes you fall flat on your face. But you can immediately ask for and get forgiveness and acceptance. You keep on confessing, repenting, getting up and going on when you fall, confident of God's love for you, confident his love is not changing or conditional. The important thing is not if you mess up, but if, despite messing up, you keep going back to God again and again and starting over. 

I believe this book has changed, is changing, and can continue to change my life. How will I know if it is life-changing?

• If I can be less defensive and more ready to own up to my sins.
• If I do not wallow in self-recrimination, self-doubt, self-loathing, self-hatred.
• If I will take what God offers me in Christ without conditions and not try to fulfill conditions I come up with and impose on myself.
• If I can trust Christ, Christ only and Christ wholly, and not what I am or do for acceptance with God.
• If I do not try to get myself into some special class of Christians that separates me from others but am always content to take my place among the ragamuffins.
• If I am quicker to acknowledge my sins and offenses, apologize to others, and request their forgiveness, not to try to stay out of trouble, but because it is the way a Christian is. 
• If I, having received mercy, will show mercy to those in need of mercy, imitating Christ rather than the world.
• If I can focus not on how others respond to me but how I respond to them.
• If I can be less judgmental of others, less ready to take offense, and more ready to forgive, not nursing grudges or resentments or hurt feelings.
• If can can be compassionate toward others in their sufferings, even when they have brought suffering on themselves.
• If I can live, not out of guilt, but out of gratitude for grace received.

Pray that he who has begun this good work in me, will continue it, will use it to bless others, and bring it to completion on the the day of Jesus Christ. 

Ending this Blog Series

Ending This Series

I began this series of Blogs which are reflections Brennan Manning's Ragamuffin Gospel as a way of chronicling what God seems to be doing in my life. As I have written several times, the two main benefits of this book have been: (1) the freedom to say that I really am the sinner I and others have known me to be and to confess and own that reality and some of it consequences to myself and others and (2) the freedom to believe that, in and by Christ, God is my heavenly Father who forgives and restores and does not stop loving me, ragamuffin that I am. I believe these two truths have been life-saving and life-changing for me. I am and always will be a ragamuffin Christian wholly dependent on God's grace.

I took as some basis for writing this series the autobiographical sections of Paul's letters where he opens up about the goings on within his own heart and his relations with others. I thought it was a good thing to open my heart to others through this Blog. I do appreciate the kind responses I have received through personal emails and public comments.

However, I have become convinced that I should not have written this series. My reflections came at too high a price: my family's privacy and freedom. I know that part of my motivation was that they might see how God is at work in my life, but, while it had that effect on some others, it did not have that effect on the members of my family. 

For this breach I apologize to each and all of them. I will make copies for myself that I may reflect on them, but I am removing the whole series of Blogs from public access.

I will complete Manning's book and go on to read my old and dear friend, Charley Chase's Grace-Focused Optimism, which he kindly gifted me, and to reflect on these books privately and in private conversations with trusted brothers in Christ. I ask your prayers.